Thursday, August 13, 2009

Display Your Tea Bagger Pride!

Have you been to a Tea Party - not the kind with doilies but rather the kind with patriotic Americans?

Do you consider yourself a "9-12"er?

Does the thought cross your mind every now and then that the clowns in charge in Washington these days couldn't find their collective rectal orifice even with the aid of the entire Capitol Page corps and a bank of klieg lights, mainly because their heads are stuck too far up the problem?

Are you convinced that everything you thought your country was all about is being stripped away and perverted into a sad parody of the Soviet Union - or worse, France?

If you can answer yes, or at least find common ground with any of these, then you are a Tea Bagger - just ask CNN's Anderson Cooper, who held forth as an authority on tea-bagging during a live CNN broadcast April 15. Ah, the wise and sober voice of experience.

Be proud, and in a very non-confrontational way let the world know who you are. Tie a couple of tea bags together and hang them over the rear view mirror in your car. That way, anyone who sees you will know.

They'll know you're just a man who wants to love his woman. Or a woman her man. Or any other combination that works for you - the plumbing isn't the point here.

You want to raise your kids right, go to work every day, and on weekends enjoy a cold beverage of your choice around the backyard grill with your friends.

You want to do your part to make this country work, and enjoy your life in the process. You don't want to be bothered with the nuts and bolts mechanics of keeping this magnificent machine that is the United States of America running.

But you are an American. And you will be damned if you'll sit idly by while a group of power hungry socialist thugs try to make this country over into something you wouldn't wish upon your worst enemy. Something that your parents, never mind the founding fathers, wouldn't even recognize. If they insist, then by God you'll stand up and do something about it.

So hang those tea bags and let them know you're coming.

Let them know exactly who you are and what you stand for.

Let them know you're mad as hell, they've gone more than far enough, and you're not going to take it any more.

Make sure they know you are an American, and that some fights are just too important to back down from no matter what threats may be leveled against you or your family.

Then have your family, friends, and neighbors hang their tea bags too.

E pluribus unum.

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