Earth Hour 2008

Let me restate for the record: I enjoy fresh air, clean water is preferable to dirty, and (deep, DEEP down) I'd be somewhat saddened to see Central Park underneath AlGore's 40 foot water puddle.

Recordings through much of the twentieth century showing an increasing trend in average average global temperatures are hard to dispute (though far from impossible in many cases), so "global warming" can be acknowledged as a factual phenomenon. What is not a proven fact is all the hysteria dumping sole responsibility squarely on the shoulders of humanity. We're not on all the planets in the solar system, yet temperature increases have been recorded on non-Earth solar bodies as well during the same period. Hmm.

Which brings us to Earth Hour 2008. Other than saving the average homeowner a few cents on the electric bill, this is nothing more than a PR stunt designed to make us feel guilty and perform penance for a crime that is not ours.

I didn't turn out any lights that I was using last night - if they were on it was to hold the dark at bay! Some wags on the radio airwaves were suggesting that rather than go dark for an hour we should all go out to Wally World, buy the highest wattage incandescent bulbs we could get our hands on and light those suckers up all night long. That was a nice idea that I found really appealing, but since the environmental wackos have already convinced the US government to put our national food supply into your gas tank instead of our cattle and bellies, I just don't have the discretionary income to play that game.

Fortunately, I was able to do my part to protest this global insanity.

Are you aware of how much smoke an eight foot by six foot by four foot pile of damp, half rotten leaves throws off? Lots! In fact, the pile is still smoldering this morning, sending a thick and steady blue-gray plume heavenward from my back yard. It's quite pretty, actually.

Lest you wonder, I sleep just fine at night. I don't fear that tropical rain forests will suddenly overtake West Virginia, nor do I fear that I'm responsible for the impending drowning of a polar bear. Sorry kids, but when we get pesky enough the planet will simply shrug us off as another failed experiment in biomass replication. The only ones saddened by our demise will be the cockroaches and the rats. They'll need to find some other species to domesticate in order to reopen the endless buffet we provide them with now.